Tuesday, July 23, 2013

A Life Threatened: Five Years Later

A reminder of what's important taken this morning
by my friend Sabrina
This is a really wonderful day for me. It is met with relief and gratitude. Five years ago today, after having headaches, blurred vision and falling over my feet one too many times...I was told it was just migraines in your thirties. but let's get you a CT scan to make sure you don't have anything serious...This afterthought by my doctor was a blessing in a disguise. Turns out that I had hydrocephalus that required emergency brain surgery. That old adage, it's not brain surgery? Was. 

I was scared, but luckily I was sedated. My sister, my boyfriend, my best friends....not so much. It was a long couple of days.

So, you rise up or let the sword fall on you. I have an acquaintance that was afflicted with cancer.which is terrible...sad and terrible. She is a survivor, but she says the word I had cancer in every cuss word sentence. Its really annoying. I searched my blog to see if I have ever prattled about this before and I am glad I haven't too much. I try to not to bring it up a lot...there is some people know, but some people have no idea. I don't know which is better. I talk about it a little, mention it every once in a while and am in the same camp with migraine sufferers when the barometric pressure is high. But five years is a big deal and I wanted to write on here about it.    

What's the takeaway for me? An awareness that all is not what it seems. Everything for me is black and white, there is no longer any gray area, and my lack of empathy waivers more than I would like to admit. Aw...your boyfriend cheated on your for the twelfth time and you are still doing nothing but crying over it? Did you almost die and have brain surgery...yeah...that is what I thought. Get over it...That is prob the darkest side of recovery, my lack of I give a hoot of trivial matters that are self inflicted.

The upside? I am healthy and pain free, excepts when before it rains...modern medicine is awesome....I have a bigger sense of accomplishment when I run or when I do yoga, or when I see something truly beautiful. I have an awareness of what and who are important, what matters and what doesn't. A "we will figure it out" attitude has changed me for good.

This gives me a platform to say exactly what I think because I know that life is too short. It made me fearless to leave a 18 year old job and throw myself into self employment. Turning lemons into lemonade and shaking my head at the people that just can't drag themselves out of their hole to see the light.

Hope everyone has a wonderful day! 









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